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simichand

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the night have be so long without u as I think of u wonder what happened I hold u so I hear ur heart beat
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When I first ' met ' you I thought you weren't going to be as important as you are now . We became friends , then best friends . I was able to tell you anything , and the same for you . Our late night conversations seemed endless . You suddenly became single! I was sad yet somewhat happy . I was sad since the person you had broken up with was my best friend . But I guess I was also a bit happy since I had developed a small secret crush on you . Then and there you asked me out . The break up happened through text messages as well as when you asked me out . I stupidly said yes .

You went on and on about how happy you were to call me yours . We kept a secret from your ex ( my best friend ) , just because we thought it was to soon . You told me you just couldn't hold it in and told her . She took it pretty good, then again I think she didn't . When they were together , she had mentioned how much she loved him, and that he was the first person she actually had deep feelings for . So then about a week later we had an argument . Which ended our relationship . But we stayed friends obviously . You started talking to your ex again . You told her the exact same words you told me . So it was obvious that you trying to get with her again .

And it worked . You guys got back together while I just stood there pretending I was happy . Don't get me wrong I was obviualsy happy I mean she is my best friend . But I was heartbroken . So then that ended . We kept having "on and off relatioships" . I hated it . I wanted so badly to call you mine . But when I had the chance to do that , it was only for a short time since our relationships only lasted about a week . I felt so used . You broke up with me after saying you loved me , you had me thinking I did something , that it was my fault . You would alway bring up your current girlfriends and I would say i'd be happy for you . Which i actually was because then again we were close friends . We would still hangout , which would be fun . You would always make me feel better when I was down . Thing was that when we did hang out , we got close , too close . We acted as if we were more than friends . In a way , i enjoyed it . But i also had to come back to reality , which is when I would realize that we werent actually dating .

About a month later , I hung out with her again . She had told me what you have said about me . Stuff like " I think shes the one ." When she told me that my heart lit up . I tried not to smile but it just came out . But again I realized that , that was in the past and now its all gone. We stopped talking for some reason. We just drifted apart . Months later you texted me and we started to hang out again . I remember you hugging me tightly and telling me how much you missed me . I loved it . 2015 came months later . That was the year we kissed . Im pretty sure it was someday in February . When your lips met with mine it felt like everything around me just disappeared . I honestly hoped you felt the same . I remember i pulled away because I thought of my best friend . You wanted to keep going but I wanted to be a good friend like always . Hope you weren't disappointed . Later that day we kissed again . It was longer and same as the first , it felt amazing (even though you weren't my first kiss) . When we both pulled away you hugged me and said " Aww you're shaking .... its ok ." . You made feel secure .

After a few days we hung out again . It was a Monday . You came over and we hung out . It was pretty fun , like always. You got a call and told me you had to go since you had soccer practice . I understood but I didn't want you to go. You gave me a quick hug and told me that you'll come over tomorrow . I knew it wasn't true . I was right you didn't come or even text me. I was able to tell on how you hugged me. Sounds weird but its true . The hug you gave me was surprisingly quick . You've never hugged me like that before. We didn't talk for months straight until you texted me . You have no idea how happy I was . But sadly for me , that didn't last long. My best friend would bring you up numerous times. When she did my heart sank. Just knowing the fact that you're not busy or anything and yet not texting me irritated me. Did I do something? You had these questions going on in my head for days. Eventually I was somewhat starting to get over you. But little things that would pop up in my head led to me thinking of you.

About a month passed . I hung out with my friend again. This was recently actually. On the last few hours of our day together, she invited you over . It was awkward and I know you felt the same way. It felt like I was meeting you for the very first time again . I completely hated it. After everything , this is where we end up now . Not even a " Hi ." Sometimes I think to myself, " Yeah , there is other people I'm going to meet along the way. " But you always end up coming back . I still miss you . It's hard not thinking about you . I know you dont feel the same way. I was told that you now have a girlfriend. Its now May 6 , and still nothing from you . I'll still be thinking about you whether youre doing the same or not . I miss you .

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